“Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right.” ~ Oprah Winfrey

New dreams. New wheelchair. New approach. That’s how I’m bringing in the new year.

The past 12 months was a challenge. I exhausted a large amount of time going in and out of the hospital. Lifeless. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t talk. Thoughts floating to the ceiling. Ten toes up. Back flat on the bed. Staring at the heavens.

They say I was having seizures. I have to take their word for it. I don’t remember much. I know I didn’t have control of what was happening. I was losing consciousness. No one knew and I couldn’t tell them.

Now I’m back home like nothing ever happened. Cleansing my mind of bad intentions. Trying to hide from the chaos. Masking up. Hearing people say viruses are not real. They don’t believe the doctors. They say it’s all fake. But I can’t think that way. I can’t afford to get sick. Not even a little. Because I’m already sick. Besides I know some people who got ill. They walked into the hospital, got discharged and are still fighting symptoms today.

Despite that fear, I will remain positive. Feet planted on the ground. Constantly looking up at the sky. Craving sweet words to lighten the bitter taste in my mouth. Closing my eyes and falling into my faith. Getting high on the optimism of friends and family.

Embracing social media post. Seeing the beauty on my timeline. Joyful pictures of gleeful people. Likes and happy stories from around the world. Private emails from strangers full of encouraging words. A community of individuals coming together to support each other. These deeds keep me inspired.

I don’t have money. I don’t have answers. I don’t have foresight. But I do have words that I use to raise awareness. To spread love and help people relate to our experiences.

That is what I’ll focus on in the new year.