My Greatest Goal

I may look handicapped but I don’t have to act like it.

This too shall pass. I know and believe this always. Still I must cautiously scream it because recently, I’ve been feeling pretty stable in this normal of mine. As a matter of fact it resembles the old me I know and love. Now I haven’t gotten any miracle drugs or anything I’m just taking my regular meds including my newest prescription of Amprya. Oh and at physical therapy they’ve started putting me on this Functional Electrical Stimulation (FES) device. It basically delivers impulses directly to the muscles bypassing my weary nerves. This assists my legs allowing me to do things I can’t do on my own. My heart accelerates and I even get a bit winded as if I’m exercising. Initially, I was using it while riding the associated bike, they later figured out a way to use it while I stood and held on to something sturdy. I would lift my leg as far as I could and the pulses to my muscles would do the rest. Does that make sense? Well, afterwards I can do movement I couldn’t before albeit slow and deliberately.

Not to belabor the point, but it works similar to the Bioness. You remember the device my insurance company won’t cover.

Lately I’m using my walker more inside the house. No more crawling. Maybe all these things are coming together to keep me in good spirits. And that’s really the endpoint for me. I may look handicapped but I don’t have to act like it. Like I’ve said time and time again, if I let M.S. take my spirit then I’m losing the battle.

Thank goodness I’m not. Losing… that is. I think I’ll just keep riding this wave.

Folks, this is what works for me. My greatest goal is help you find what works for you.

I’ll leave with a quote I just stumbled upon and thought it would was befitting for this post.

“You have a choice. You can live in the No of your life or you can live in the Yes. Look at what is flowing, working, moving. Being in that energy will beget more positive experiences.” – Unknown.

I’m Moving On

Despite my set back my spirit is not broken.

“It has been determined that the use of a lower extremity functional neuromuscular stimulation device (the device I want) in the home setting as a technique to restore nerve function and provide ambulation as investigative therefore we are unable to approve the NESS L300… says Blue Cross.

So that’s the end for my dream of getting the Bioness foot drop system. Of course I can always purchase it without insurance, but it costs $6,000 bucks. AGH!!!

The letter arrived a few days ago, but I couldn’t collect my thoughts well enough to write about it. I really thought they might pay for it because they do cover DME (durable medical equipment). Nevertheless they won’t this time. I already appealed the decision and was turned down. I managed to console and convince myself that life with Thelma (my scooter) isn’t that bad. That is, as long as a ramp is provided.

I would also like to share that I was approved for the drug AMPYRA®. It is a medication developed as a treatment to improve walking in people with multiple sclerosis. It’s actually the first pill of its kind. To be honest I don’t know if that’s good or bad. Maybe this will be my best option now. I’ve had few friends comment that I seemed to be getting around better with my walker, so I’m going to count that as a postive result so far.

Despite my set back my spirit is not broken. Oh, don’t get me wrong I was devastated after seeing the rejection. Reading that letter was like being slapped in the face. I had put so much hope in it. But still I’m moving on. At least, that is…Thelma and I.

I’m So Excited

I think this may be the answer to all my problems.

I’m so excited!!!

I recently went through a free trial run of a technology that could help me with walking! Albeit, at this point it’s gonna have to be walking with a walker. I have less balance and stamina then I’ve had in the past. These days though walking around my apartment would be welcomed, so boy am I hopeful! Some would tell me to “calm down”(I hear that a lot more than I would like).

I know it’s risky to bet all my chips on black. I’ve been doing it for years. One of two things happen. Either I get what I want or I end up sobbing in the bathroom. The latter seeming to be far too common.

Paying for this latest treatment seems to be the question now. Insurance or Medicare being the obvious answer, but I heard Medicare doesn’t cover it and my other insurance already denied the claim last year. It’s that I finally got a chance to actually try it out. I just need to work on my balance issues. I wonder if physical therapy can address that? I guess first I need to concentrate on one thing at a time.

You see I always stumble on these things that I think will be absolutely life changing. The answer to all my problems. I get so amped up. So ready to dive in full force. I’ve been like this even before Multiple Sclerosis was in the picture. But at least I get it honestly from my father. Even my sister has it too!

The product representative said the MS Society offers grants to help pay for this walk technology. Before I apply for aid I need to get a prescription from my doctor and ask his opinion on the device.

Meanwhile, please forgive me if I seem anxious. It’s because, I’m so excited!!!